Life on the Plains

A haiku I was compelled to compose yesterday:


The wind, relentless.
My mind like a tumbleweed -
restlessly rattles.

The wind and I are at odds with one another.  I am always telling Tyler that if I had been a Texas ranching pioneer (Perish the thought.  Ugh.  The flies.  The heat.  THE WIND. So thankful I was not.) I would surely have been brought low by "prairie fever" and ended up like poor Mrs. Brewster:  limp nightgown, wild hair, staring blankly into the distance rocking a baby back and forth, back and forth, contemplating when to pull out the old butcher knife.  (Yes, that's a Little House On The Prairie reference...These Happy Golden Years to be more specific.)

I don't mind a nice breeze, but when wind positively rattles the windows and whistles around the walls all day and night it really gets to me.  Maybe wind could be a new and effective interrogation technique for law enforcement.  Perhaps living on the Texas plains isn't the optimal environment for me...I wonder what is?  I'm thinking green mountains with streams and meadows for larking about in a la The Sound of Music opening song, but I don't think the opportunity will arise for me to move to the Austrian alps to test my hunch. 

Cold, Cold, Go Away

I am finally, hopefully, very nearly, almost over a terrible cold that has had me in its sinister grip for over three weeks.  It was a doozie of a cold.  On Monday I finally got my sense of smell and taste back, which prompted some thoughts about how losing your sense of smell has both positive and negative sides.

For example, food doesn't taste good, so it really takes the pleasure out of eating, and therefore you're not inclined to do as much of it.  That can be a big plus for dieters.  In fact, why do they not just come out with a diet pill that inhibits your sense of smell?  Or a pill that makes everything you eat after you take it taste like tin foil, or just really bitter or some other unpleasant sensation.  It can't be that hard to create such a thing. I think it's a winning idea.  Truly.

And there's another thing...this requires a story, so get comfortable.  Last Saturday the whole family was at Costco (yes, that's right.  We took the whole family to Costco on a Saturday.  I told you I'd been sick for three weeks right?  I wasn't in my right mind).  We were in the laundry detergent aisle and I added our usual Kirkland liquid detergent to the basket.  Tyler says, "They have a coupon for the powered detergent also.  I wonder if it's cheaper?  I know we never get it, but I don't know why."  We looked, and of course it was cheaper.  I had a vague notion that we never buy powder because I don't like it, but I couldn't remember what in the world my reason was, so I decided to give it another try.  We took out the liquid and added the powder and we were on our way.  Fast forward two days to Monday when my sense of smell started to return.  I walked downstairs that evening and said to Tyler "Something smells so weird down here."  I couldn't think what it could be.  Well, you guessed it, the first time I walked into the laundry room I figured it out.  That powdered laundry detergent was overpowering me with its "clean fresh scent".  And the box hasn't even been opened.  I shudder to think what will happen when I finally pull that cardboard strip and start using the stuff.  I'll have to put a clothespin on my nose while I load the washing machine...and who knows how I will survive actually having to wear the clothes that have been permeated by that smell.  If only I hadn't been robbed of my sense of smell by my cold I could have avoided weeks of olfactory unpleasantness with this detergent.  Although I am saving 2 cents a load over my non-offending liquid detergent, so there's that.

Lastly, another thing that's kind of a pro and kind of a con.  On Monday I also discovered that my kitchen washcloth was emitting some serious fumes of rottenness.  I'm usually highly sensitive to this and change my kitchen washcloth a lot, but because I couldn't smell anything I forgot all about changing it.  I guess the only pro here is that I was spared smelling it.  The con, of course, is that I was using a foul wash cloth to wipe my counters for a day or two.  But why am I the only one in my house who notices things like the smell of the kitchen washcloth?  You'd think someone would have mentioned it - we all use the kitchen quite frequently.  Oh well.  I am just happy to be very nearly, almost, quite possibly, over my horrible cold.

P.S. I shouldn't be surprised that people leaving comments know the same movies I do...the original Parent Trap, Sleepless In Seattle, and The Family Man. 

Name That Movie

Sometimes I find myself thinking of obscure quotes from movies I really, really enjoy.  Do you want to know which one popped into my head yesterday?  Here you go:

"Did you bring home all your underwear and personal things?"

If I was into this blogging thing I might make it a contest in the comments to see who could guess it correctly first,  but my sister Sally would have to be disqualified.  She and I watched the same five movies over and over again for about two years.  I'd tell you which five movies, but then you'd be able to figure out where all my random quotes come from, so I'll keep that information on the down-low for now.

Here's another really random one from a different movie that Sally would get in one second:

(singing) "Horses, horses, horses"

And from that movie again:

"Who can believe this?!"

As strange as it seems, those two lines crack Sally and I up every single time.  

I just love having people around that laugh in all the same parts of movies as I do.  I had a good friend I met in graduate school who I visited once after we'd both moved.  We spent an evening each eating our own pint of Ben and Jerry's and watching a movie that contained this line:

"This is just...sub-par."

The fact that we both found that amusing was just one more reason it was a great trip. 

If anyone knows what movies all of these quotes are from I will be seriously impressed!  

Holiday Hoopla

We had some holiday fun around here.  Our ward had a Gingerbread House contest at the Christmas party.  We decided to be nontraditional and make a gingerbread semi-truck - Peterbilt, of course, in deference to Tyler's place of work :). 

Christmas was a great day.  The kids were so happy and nobody threw any fits about anything they got or didn't get or that someone else got or didn't get.

 Wesley happily ate all the chocolate from his stocking in between his turns at opening a present.

 And it snowed!  We had a white Christmas for the second time since we moved here.  Kind of amazing and totally awesome. 

After Christmas things went down hill a little bit - Tyler got pink eye and there was some other health-related unpleasantness, but after a couple of days things cleared up and calmed down and by New Year's Eve we were ready to party.

Some friends were asking if our kids stay up until midnight...that has never happened.  In fact they don't stay up at all if we're not at a party.  We do a big countdown after dinner, no matter what time it is, and toast each other with our Martinelli's and call it good.  This year we had some friends over for dinner and when they had to leave to go their family New Year's Eve party we did our countdown.  I think it was 8:30.  The kids loved it and it doesn't bother them one bit that it isn't midnight.

And now all the holiday hoopla is behind us and we are back to our normal routine.  Our church schedule changed to 8:30 am (it was 1:30 pm) and I am enormously excited by that.  I love having the whole afternoon to spend together as opposed to having the whole morning to wait around until it's time to get ready for church. 

What else am I excited about in the new year?  CT turns 8 next month!  We have family coming to town to see him get baptized.  We always look forward to visitors.  This summer I'm planning on spending a couple of weeks in Utah to visit - any of you who also plan trips to Utah to visit family during the summer should coordinate your times - synch your watches!  I would love to have a big party and see as many friends as possible!

Sad and Happy

I have been sad.  Hearing about what happened to the little children and their teachers in Connecticut filled me with sorrow.  The uncontrollably crying kind.  I haven't felt that much grief since my baby Gwendolyn was stillborn.  It was tough.  I kept saying to myself, "I have all of this empathy for those parents.  To what purpose?  What can I do with it to make it useful?  How can this grief be to the benefit of those who truly have cause to mourn?"  I'm still thinking about that question.

Interestingly, last week (or maybe the week before) I saw a Frontline on PBS about a mortuary. I think it was called "The Business of Dying" or something like that.  The mortician who was the main person they interviewed had some insights into how our culture deals with death that I thought were worthwhile.  He talked about how we are so removed from death now...in the old days death was so much more hands on.  People weren't swept away in a black car never to be seen again until they were pristine and dressed in their finest laid out for burial.  Loved ones dealt with the dead from the moment it happened until the last shovel full of dirt was tamped into place.  Death really is a part of life.  None of us can avoid it.  But it seems like our whole culture today is built upon just that principal - to avoid death in any way.  I do believe that grieving would be easier if we all weren't working so hard to pretend that death isn't out there, or doesn't affect us, or isn't something that we should let ourselves think about. 

  So, I have thought about death, and naturally that means I have also thought about life.  Specifically the life each of my children are living right now.  They are each having such a unique experience in life, and sometimes I try to imagine what it is like for them.  How is it to have me for a mother?  What are their days like when I'm not with them?  What do they think about in their quiet moments?  I love talking to them and coming to understand little pieces of the answers to these questions.  Ultimately, it is their lives that are the most interesting thing about my own.  How could you not want to happily go through life with these faces?

Post-Halloween Post

Here we are again, eh?  Back for another little chat.  So, what's new?  Hmm...

Halloween is over.  I'd put up some pictures but I never get around to that.  Just picture in your mind's eye two girls dressed as angels with fluffy white halos, long white dresses, and fancy angel wings (thanks for the costumes Grandma!), one big kid decked out as an alligator wrestler (picture a Steve Irwin type guy) and a baby wearing an alligator costume to complete the vignette.  We had a good time at our ward's Trunk-or-Treat.  Tyler and I even dressed up for that one.  I was Mary Poppins and he was Bert (the sidewalk art Bert, in the Barbershop Quartet looking get-up, not the chimney sweep Bert).  Everyone knew who I was, and if they saw us together they knew who Tyler was.  If they saw him alone no one knew who he was supposed to be, so he had to stay close to me all evening...which was kind of strange because I'm not used to being around him much...

Between his work schedule, his MBA class, and his church calling I just don't spend much time with him, and the children see him less than me.  It's not my favorite thing.  I'm always telling myself that lots of wives have husbands they don't see much...but that's not so comforting really.  Growing up with a dad who is a university professor and always available and home a lot spoiled me.  I didn't come into my marriage expecting to be basically a single parent for long stretches of time.  I know it's no fun for Tyler either but it's hard to feel like there is no flexibility in my life.  The possibility of doing any errand, any project, any ANYthing child-free is just not there.  It's kind of exasperating.   And I have kids that I really like and that are generally well behaved - I can only imagine the lengths I'd have to go to to survive if they were extra obnoxious and rambunctious.  I'm sure my life would have to include daily medication. 

Wesley is going through a difficult phase right now (surprise, surprise) which doesn't help.  He cries a tortured and delirious cry if I am not holding him or directly engaged with him in some way every waking moment.  If I try to do something he grabs my legs in his freakishly strong vice grip and won't let go.  I know all babies do this to some extent, but he is absolutely relentless with it.  He does it all day, everyday.  Every time I put him down.  It really wears me out.

On the plus side, we are having a week of amazing fall weather.  In the low 70's, and some of the leaves are turning colors.  The end of daylight savings time means an afternoon spent at the city park ends as the sun is setting in the beautiful Texas sky with a cool breeze rustling those orange-ish leaves...a perfect Texas fall day that makes me wish I cold put it in a bottle and live it again and again when my kids are all grown up.  Or at the very least be one of those moms that takes beautiful pictures with a real camera.  I told the kids I might make them dress up in their Halloween costumes again so I could take some pictures of them outside now that it actually looks a bit like Fall.  I was too frenzied getting the kids ready and out the door by myself on the real Halloween to take any pictures at all. 

But, things are looking up.  Thanksgiving is coming, which means a week off of school for the kids and two days off of work for Tyler.  Maybe we can all get reacquainted :).

Turning Into Your Mother

You know how people say "I am turning into my mother!"when they notice they have done something a little bit bonkers?  Well, I think more accurately people should say "I have turned into a mother!", because really, most of these little things we thought were so annoying as children are not just some idiosyncrasy of our own mother, but things that just happen when faced with the realities of motherhood. 

I can think of two classic examples of things from my childhood that drove my dad and siblings and I absolutely crazy. 

One was that nearly every night my mom would make dinner, tell us it was time to eat, keep pestering us that dinner was on the table NOW, settle us all down for a prayer, and then as soon as everyone said "amen" she would excuse herself to go to the bathroom.  We all thought this was so ridiculous.  Why rush us all to the dinner table when you yourself aren't even ready to sit and down and eat it? 

Now that I am making dinner for my own family every night I understand this phenomenon completely.   I am rushing around to make dinner at the time of day when everyone is at their crankiest, with a baby crying and holding onto my legs and kids asking me how to spell things and other kids crying because someone just socked them in the face and other kids yelling out, "It was an ACCIDENT and  I said SORRY".  Somehow the meal all comes together and you manage to get your family gathered around it.  As you sit down to join them you realize "Hey, I have to use the bathroom".  And you genuinely did not have time to think of this before the instant you sat down and finally had a moment to pay attention to your personal needs.  So Mom, I apologize for all of the eye rolling and snide comments when you excused yourself to use the bathroom nearly every night.

The other example is the classic "Mom is always the last one in the car".  Sundays are the prime example.  Everyone is dressed, everyone has his or her hair combed, shoes on, scriptures found, and is in the car.  Except for Mom.  Every few second someone yells out the car window into the open door to the house "Mom, are you coming?!" And the reply "Yes...coming!" wafts back to you.  Sometimes we would even see her in the doorway and it looked like she was heading for us, but then a quick turn back into the house and we'd lose her again.   It was so exasperating.  After all, Mom was up before the rest of us.  She was showered before any one else.   Surely she has had the most time to get herself ready to go! 

Now I know all too well what happens when it's time to load up the car.  Invariably I am the last one climbing into our car on Sundays, fastening on an earring or putting fingernail polish on a run in my nylons as I get settled.  Sometimes I feel I have to explain myself so I'll start on the list "I just had to make sure I took the cake out of the oven, and that the crockpot had been turned down to low, and I had to grab the things from the printer for Sharing Time, and Lily needs a safety pin for her dress where that button popped off five minutes ago, and the snack for the baby didn't get put into the bag so I had to grab that, and I have a little something for the people I visit teach that I had to put in a bag, and of course I had to go to the bathroom".   It's funny - no matter how prepared I think I am to leave the house, suddenly, at the moment of truth, I will think of at least five things I need "grab" or "run and check on" before I can actually leave.

So Mom, I'm sorry for giving you a hard time about this one too.  I now realize that these things just sometimes come with the job.  I really appreciate the work you put into being my mom, and I hope someday my own children will come to the same realization (and in so many things if I could honestly say "I am turning into my mother!" it would be a huge compliment).